Post by Some dipshit on Jun 4, 2008 12:15:44 GMT -5
So,this is my first Fanfic.It is too much of a coincidence that I started this in the middle of the Fanfic Boom,isn't it?
Anyways,I wanted to give the Noir theme a try,along with Mc Jesus.
I'd be dlighted to receive criticism.
The lights flickered again in the office.It was rather dark and a little filthy,but a real paradise in the hygiene standards of the city.
Two people were sitting there,both separated by an old desk crowded with papers,burger crumbs and cigarette ashes.
"So,let me get this straight..."He said,snuffing his cigarette on the old ashtray"...your daughter was kidnapped."
"Y-Yes...I-I don't know what else...what else to do..."The woman struggled,once again,to refrain from crying.
He rose the cigarette and returned it to his mouth.After a while,he exhaled a smoke-clad sigh.
"Okay.I take the case.Two thousand."Was his reply.It came out in the bored,dull tone of the professional private eye.
The woman swallowed,but managed to get a hold of herself.A cheque,written and signed with shaky caligraphy,was laid next to the ashtray.The detective took a nice look at it,and buried it in his pocket.
"Pic?"Wordlessly,she extracted a little photgraph out of her purse and gave it to him.It was folded by the middle.He took it and placed it with the cheque.
Everything had have been said.The woman stood up and left the place,still sobbing.
When she closed the door,she took a last glance at the door.Her last hope was behind it,attending now to his lunch.
Dabbing her eyes,she walked into the dark,rain-poured streets...
Anyways,I wanted to give the Noir theme a try,along with Mc Jesus.
I'd be dlighted to receive criticism.
Prologue
The lights flickered again in the office.It was rather dark and a little filthy,but a real paradise in the hygiene standards of the city.
Two people were sitting there,both separated by an old desk crowded with papers,burger crumbs and cigarette ashes.
"So,let me get this straight..."He said,snuffing his cigarette on the old ashtray"...your daughter was kidnapped."
"Y-Yes...I-I don't know what else...what else to do..."The woman struggled,once again,to refrain from crying.
He rose the cigarette and returned it to his mouth.After a while,he exhaled a smoke-clad sigh.
"Okay.I take the case.Two thousand."Was his reply.It came out in the bored,dull tone of the professional private eye.
The woman swallowed,but managed to get a hold of herself.A cheque,written and signed with shaky caligraphy,was laid next to the ashtray.The detective took a nice look at it,and buried it in his pocket.
"Pic?"Wordlessly,she extracted a little photgraph out of her purse and gave it to him.It was folded by the middle.He took it and placed it with the cheque.
Everything had have been said.The woman stood up and left the place,still sobbing.
When she closed the door,she took a last glance at the door.Her last hope was behind it,attending now to his lunch.
Dabbing her eyes,she walked into the dark,rain-poured streets...
